Going Back to Work After Adoption

Your baby is here! As you begin to settle in, you're in awe of the brand new addition and want to be with him or her constantly. But before long, financial stresses may beckon and you may have to go back to work. As an adoptive parent, you might hate the prospect of leaving your child or wince at the idea of separating from him or her just when you're starting to bond.

Though separation seems difficult, you can take it easy. Research has revealed that babies need familiar, regular care providers, with whom they can create a trusting bond. So long as your child-care arrangement offers that component, it could meet your baby's emotional needs and enhance his or her connection with you. Every time a familiar adult meets a baby's needs, the baby develops trust – the backbone of healthy attachment. That trust could be transferred from one adult to another, with each relationship being special.

Your Choices

That isn't to say that all caregiving situations are made the same, or that your child won't fare better in one situation over another. Listed here are the pros and cons for three common child-care settings.

One-on-one care (family member, trusted companion or neighbor, hired childcare professional)

• Pros: An infant gets personal, constant care. This can be particularly useful for recently adopted babies or small children, or for those who have trouble eating, sleeping, or just being comforted. Parents can easily set up a child's daily schedule and educate the care provider about adoption.
• Cons: A personal childcare professional could be expensive.

Family day care

• Pros: Modest, family-like settings (often inside a caregiver's home) can be socially enriching and offer a feeling of familiarity and comfort to your adopted baby. Parents might find family day care to be much more accommodating than day-care centers, when it comes to hours and other arrangements, and less expensive than hiring a private caregiver.
• Cons: You will need a plan b if the caregiver or your child becomes ill. Your son or daughter won't get as much personal attention as she would with a private sitter.

Day-care centers

• Pros: Children typically spend the day taking part in developmentally appropriate activities-a benefit for some adopted babies. (Others, who are very easily overwhelmed, will find day-care centers too busy.) Staff might be trained to work with little ones and to meet safety and hygiene specifications.
• Cons: Along with less personal attention, some centers have significant staff turnover, so the care might not be consistent. Parents have less input regarding their child's eating and sleeping daily schedules.