How to Place Your Baby For Adoption
When you fully grasp that you're expecting a baby and not certain if you want to be a parent, that's the time to begin thinking about adoption. If you wait around to begin getting information about the whole process of adoption until you have "decided", you'll have made the decision in a vacuum -- without having sufficient information to make a good choice. And lacking the necessary or accurate information, you may well make the wrong choice.
1. Begin getting information. The first step is to begin gathering information. And we say "start" since you will want to continue to collect information all through your pregnancy to make sure your choice to either place your child for adoption or parent your youngster by yourself continues to be the correct one. You don't have to rush into a choice either way. And don't be scared of getting information about adoption. You can easily "browse" or "window shop" the thought of placing your child for adoption. Acquiring details about something does not mean you've decided to make it happen.
2. Speak to a reputable adoption professional. Attorneys who focus on adoption and licensed adoption agencies are the best resources for unbiased details. Talk to a minimum of about three different professionals.
3. Ask questions. Ask the exact same questions of each one of the adoption professionals you get in touch with. Evaluate their answers. You'll get a feel for what rings true. You will also get a feel for each professional's philosophy and strategy relating to adoption. You need to make sure that whomever you decide to help you through the process respects you and your right to decide what you want for your child.
4. Finish the paperwork. Every attorney or agency will have you complete some forms so they can collect info from you that they need to share with potential adoptive parents. It is crucial that you're totally open and honest about your reason behind placing your little one for adoption and your and the baby's dad's health background. It is also imperative that you share with your adoption professional what the baby's father knows -- or does not know -- about your pregnancy as well as your plan for adoption. In a few states, the dad's legal rights can be legally terminated in early stages in your pregnancy.
5. Select a family. Your adoption professional can help you pick a family. Be sure you have enough information and enough control over the process so that you can choose a family you know you can love and have faith in. You need to be able to meet the potential family and also hang out with them while pregnant.
6. Give birth. You might decide to invite the adoptive mother and father to be present in the hospital whenever you give birth and even to be in the hospital room with you, if you want. It's your choice whether or not to extend the invitation for them to be there.
7. Keep in touch. Throughout the matching process with the adoptive family you'll have determined whether to keep in touch after the baby comes into the world and how much contact you and they feel is acceptable. Generally, the adoptive parents will be sending you letters (or email messages) and photos often during the baby's first year and then maybe a few times a year from then on. That's usually the least amount of contact you may expect. Many people are in much more regular contact than that. It just is dependent upon you and the adoptive family's choices. If you want, make a scrapbook of your life and give it to the adoptive parents. They will be able to share it with the child as he or she gets older. Make a picture album for you to keep all the photos you receive of the child. It'll mean a great deal to you as time goes on.
8. Enjoy life! You've made the very brave decision to place your little one for adoption since you believe it is what is good for you and for your baby. You gave the very best gift any mother or father can give their child -- a happy, secure and wonderful life with two parents who will care for him or her and love him or her always. So now, it's your job to live your life completely and happily. There isn't any place for feeling remorseful in adoption, only joy and the assurance that you made the challenging decision that any good mother in your situation would make for her baby. Live your life!